Sometimes I look back at how I was. Sometimes it seems like I did less "bad stuff" than I do now, or whatever you right wing politicians want to call it. But follow my meandering thought process as I consider a few things...I saw a kid at the intersection of Saanich and Blanshard the other day, and he had a sign that showed a burger and fries. I could have argued for days on how he could just as easily go and spend any money i give him on drugs or alcohol. Or maybe how he should just go get a job like everyone else. I would have never had a problem driving right on by him and would never have even felt a hint of empathy, but just the other day I found myself considering how I would be feeling if I had nothing. What if I was forced to such a desperate act of begging on the street and trusting on the generosity of others to fill my stomach.
And this is what I have come to consider... I think I was plagued by a different sort of sin. A kind of sin that the world has taught me to so cleverly cover up. It was the sin of contempt of others. It was the sin of unforgiveness... and the list goes on. They were attitudes that I so deviously convinced myself were justified.
This day though, I was moved to consider how I would hope to be treated if I was in such deplorable state of poverty. I decided to show that I care about him more than the five dollar bill in my pocket. I didn't worry about what he was going to do with it. All I can be expected to do is show to him that I value him as a person and can empathize with his poverty. I can't extend him love with the conditions that he must go purchase a value meal at some fast food joint. We have been given love unconditionally and I should hope that I can give him that as well.
That was wordy and I admire you if you are still reading... but I felt like I really wanted to give an example of the sins that I was ignoring for so long. That's just an example though. And these sins I was brushing under the carpet seem just as plentiful (if not more) than these new ones that I am seeing. But you know what? I feel like I'm living in an arena of sin that I have a chance against. I am becoming more and more aware of my sins and the things that I want to change about myself. I am now convinced that being generous whenever possible is a better way to live. I am convinced that loving a person without any sort of agenda is a better way to love. I feel like when I sin now, I'm no longer fighting blindly but am making leaps and bounds and finding the person I've been created to be.
Does that make sense to anyone?
